Please pick only 1 post size.
(I am working late at night in a 24-hour pharmacy. There are only three customers in the store: a scruffy but clean young couple and another gentleman. The woman in the young couple is very heavily pregnant, and her partner is picking up the range of baby hats we carry and holding them up against her stomach, then looking at the prices and sadly putting them back. They pick up a packet of the cheapest pain medication we carry and bring it to the counter.)
Female Customer: “I’m sorry, but can you please ask the pharmacist if these are safe for me to take?”
Me: “Of course!”
(While we’re waiting for the pharmacist to come out, they tell me they’re expecting their daughter any day now. The pharmacist has been watching the young couple since they came in.)
Pharmacist: “These are fine, but can I ask why you need them?”
Female Customer: “Oh, I have a horrible cough that’s making my back ache even worse. I can’t get to sleep.”
(The pharmacist goes through a list of cough medicines safe for her to take, before the young man shakes his head with tears in his eyes.)
Male Customer: “I’m sorry, I’ve just lost my job and we really can’t afford any of those. Sorry for wasting your time.”
Pharmacist: “That’s okay, but this packet is damaged, and legally I can’t let you take it. Seeing as it was the last one, let me and [my name] go look in the back for some more.”
(The pharmacist takes me out the back, where he puts three packets of name brand painkillers, four bottles of name brand cough syrup, a wheat bag for her back, a tin of formula, a packet of newborn nappies and a few of the hats the couple was looking at into a box. He hands me the box and tells me to take it out to them. I do and they both burst into tears, thanking us over and over again. They leave with huge smiles on their faces.)
Female Customer: “Thank you again!”
Other Customer: “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help but over hear. Did you say you just lost your job at [local company]?”
Male Customer: “Yes, I was an IT tech.”
Other Customer: “I own [other computer store in the area], and I’m looking for a new tech. Can you start tomorrow?”
(There were tears all round that night. A week later, the young woman brought in her beautiful daughter and a giant batch of cupcakes for the pharmacy staff. Best night at work ever!)

pishposhspice:

my roommate is 2 days younger than me so i’ve gotten into the habit of saying “when i was your age..” and then describing what i did 2 days ago

yasgawd:

bae be like

yourfiancebeyonce:

my mom posted this on my facebook wall because i dont want to go to the zoo with her

image

infinitemachine:

toothlessrebel:

asgardiantelevision:

image

Doesn’t look like a limerick to you? Try this:

A dozen, a gross, and a score
Plus three times the square root of four
Divided by seven
Plus five times eleven
Is nine squared and not a bit more.

THE FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCCCKKKKKKK

::Slow applause::

shadowofchaos725:

darkknight-tactician-ayla:

okay so apparently some people are having trouble seeing that last picture so i tried this again

Frigging hell, this is genius.

textsfromthevolleyballcourt:

Woah.

Sudden Clarity Kageyama, here to blow your minds.

villarrr:

THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY FAVORITE THING

bombing:

just saw a post accusing Obama of working for the government